Is this an age old question? Perhaps not, but it is certainly on every women’s mind . Some women think if they know what a man wants, they will be closer to snagging the elusive golden ring or in this case a wedding ring. Many relationship struggles due to the breakdown of communication between men and women. Men are commonly not either comfortable or willing to discuss their insecurities, fears, and inner most desires. Often times these are not even feelings known, more often than not they lie on the subconscious. This makes open communication nearly impossible thus leaving a women muttering “what do men really want?”
In today’s society there is now a “modern man”. Women are even more in awe of the modern man, because their is now the modern women. Modern women are thought to be empowered by their own sexuality and confident in their role in the world. Where does this leaving modern man? Usually wondering what he wants.
A modern women’s image says, smart, independent and therefore if a man wants her fine, and if not no problem there is another around the corner. While this means women have made many strides ahead, this is actually a step back for men. A men wants to be needed. It is a primary response to being with a women. If that initial primary urge is taken away, a man is left struggling to find where his place is.
At the core of every man is the age old historic “chromagnum man”. Being needed is directly related to giving love. Having a women to need a man, equates to a man’s primal instinct to love , provide and protect. Many women do not see the direct correlation. They presume to protect means jealously, to provide means control and find the love to be absent. Men love through protecting and providing. Does a man know this is what he wants? Sure, but we are back to that “subconscious level” again. He may not know exactly what he wants, but he relies on instinct. This can be were the communication issue comes in.
If a women is constantly asking “what do you want”? It may be difficult for a man to answer since he actually may not know how to answer. Incessant questions may just escalate the tension in the relationship. The key here is to try to take a look at this relationship for a mans perspective to get to know what he could really want.
There are no “relationship headquarters” to consult when you can figure out what men really want. Sure it would be helpful if we a “technical support” hot line, but we don’t. All we can do is try to listen to what they say, and hear what they don’t.
